Self Defeat

Humans are social creatures, or so I've been told by individuals who seemed to know what they were talking about.  As social individuals, there's a constant search for acceptance as well as relationships or some other connection with other humans.  Due to the need for a sense of belonging being essential, one would assume socialization would be a simplistic and natural aspect of life.  Unfortunately there appears to be a need to fuck ourselves over with established unwritten procedures on how to go about communicating with others.(boring)  We're self destructive in the sense that we place restrictions on how we might go about meeting new people or simply carrying a conversation; thus leading to the downfall of our society.

We've all ridden in a lift before, though have we ever conducted a conversation with a perfect stranger within  the ride up?  Most people haven't.  As humans, the typical reasoning behind interacting with another lies behind a specific motive.  We're looking for something; information, something of a material nature, perhaps you find the individual attractive, or merely attempting to make yourself feel better through a process of human contact.  If the possible interaction with the individual standing before you possesses none of that which was listed above however, their existence is rendered of no importance to you and the both of you will continue your lives unchanged. (reality makes for a shitty romance film)  Because of this preconceived notion that all interaction is assumed under the conception of some sort of incentive, we all tend to be tentative towards strangers and attempt to figure out said motivation. (often times coming off as a prick)  The funniest part about it all is that if social interaction turns out to lack any specific motive, the whole conversation is to be considered weird in some fashion.  There used to be a time where we didn't need an excuse to strike up conversation, what happened to those days?



With the odds already against you, eventually you'll find the need to make contact with someone whom you aren't forced to socialize with, that being outside of the nature of an appointment, job, swingers party, (whatever the hell people do nowadays) etc.  Do to this lack of preparation of background information, our poorly socialize minds recklessly attempt to make some sort of introduction to this unfamiliar individual without sounding like a twat.  Now if it's merely a simplistic question, like asking for the time, our tendency is to ask, thank, and then immediately consider the person dead to you.  When something requires more contact, the complexity of the situation become much greater.

Both consciously and unconsciously do we select whom we communicate with.  Demeanour, physical appearance, social class, race are all considered before you even open your mouth. (don't deny it)  That's right, predating any verbal message both you and the person to be communicated with have effectively judged one-another. (congrats)

Now here comes the fun part, what do you say to a person to which you know nothing about? (assuming you still want to converse with this judgmental bastard)  Where the number of topics to which to introduce are limitless, we're forced, or at least expected, to conform our message in the manner of "small talk", which happens to be a fancy term for bullshit.  Where you're likely to draw painfully droll trivial information from this ritual, I personally prefer the use of more meaningful questions.  Regrettably, though there is likely an infinite number of interesting questions (what does  Sylvester Stallone singing "One Week" by Barenaked Ladies sound like? you know he does), there appears to be a finite level of patients within the average individual.  That being said, in order to sustain the attention of the average person you're obligated to reach some sort of point or simply end the conversation.  Making a point, to which I may or may not be failing at, is a rather mundane procedure; especially considering how many subjects are labeled as "inappropriate".

Apparently there are certain topics and behaviours to refrain from using within conversation.  As to what those might be, fuck if I know. (why on earth would you ask me?)  Recently I was informed that vocalizing an individual's observed hypocritical tendencies is evidently frowned upon.  Personally, if I was in violation of something like that, I'd definitely want it brought to my attention.    I suppose that'd help explain the single lifestyle which I've reluctantly grown accustom to; that and an open admittance to lacking in the department of socially established sanity.

Humanity's superficial constructs on communication has riddled conversation with far too many social requirements, complicating an aspect we require in order to survive.  No longer can a friendly conversation occur without the looming threat of a hidden agenda nor is it proper to conduct a random person in a social manner without being invited.  We've become a self defeating, paranoid populous (tell me that isn't fun to say: paranoid populous) only harming our chances for meeting new and interesting people.